Happy New Year to Me NOT!

OK...so what happens in my garden between planting and harvesting?  Please anyone...just take a guess....  OK...well the answer is NOTHING.  In fact, there is no 'harvest.'   My biggest success this cool season has been to pick  a few leaves off a lettuce.  Not the whole lettuce mind you....just a few leaves.  Cuz the rest of the lettuce ISN'T GROWING!

 Truly.

My garden does not grow.

It just does not grow.

I plant seeds or seedlings and nothing happens.   NOTHING.  The beds look terrific for awhile and then...they look the same the next week and the next and the next and the next and the next...and as long as I continue watering..they look the same...as if they've been frozen in time.

Is this a lesson in patience?   Are the Gardening Gods on high rolling in laughter, barely able to catch their breath?  Well, if your listening, Gardening Gods...this is NOT FUNNY.  Look closely at this mug... not laughing.  Not amused.

I admit that I don't have luck much with things that need to grow.  I had a cat once, it never grew bigger than a kitten.  Kinda strange.  I had large fish tank with a couple fish in it that never grew - even though the pimply faced kid at the pet store told me they would grow bigger once in the larger tank.  The thought that  I could see them swimming to and fro from across the room without my glasses excited me.  Not only didn't they grow, they died.  So much for container serenity.

I have a problem getting yeast to grow and indulge me a perfect loaf of bread.

'Just add water' sponge figures don't grow.

My son is a slow grower.  Little scruff of a thing at 13.

Hmmm.. is there a bigger picture here that I've not stumbled upon.  Maybe it's time to burn sage.

Simply put - I'm not so excited about the pending New Year. Why?  Because I've just lived through my first full year of two great growing seasons that haven't panned out for me.  It's not that I'm a sore loser... OK, well, I am a sore loser - a frustrated farmer!   In fact, I'm about as BITTER AS THE LAST LETTUCE I CONSUMED!  OK, I pretended it was arugula...and everyone 'bought it.'   But the 'bitter Betty' that I've become can only live in my world so long.

You know, it could be that my biggest mistake was positioning my greenhouse in an area that gets full sun in the winter while my raised beds are in shadow most of the day.    !!!  Hmmm so much for planning!

AHA MOMENT.

I'm doomed.

Or, do I start growing inside the greenhouse?

What to do, what to do?

Any hints?